A Successful Costume.

Last Saturday Night. Portland, ME. The Apartment of Nathan Amadon.

Halloween Party.

So all I hear all day is "Are you going to the party?" or "What are you going to be tonight? Tonight? The party! The party at Nate's!" I never officially received an invite but attained confirmation that my presence would be accepted and welcomed, if not desired already. This made me feel obliged to attend. Dress up, Find a Ride, Drink my Eyes Out, Find a Way back Home. I've spent few nights with lesser goals. There were a couple issues that compromised my imbibing of alcohol till my eyes were removed, such as my duty to wake up and go to a tech rehearsal at 9:00 a.m. EST the next day. It was going to be a risk, but one I was willing to run. Consumption control was demanded. I was ready to roll with this.

My costume, bee tee double you, consisted exclusively of pretty wings, a bow and arrow and adult diapers. Cupid. I decided to go as Cupid. I had the rest of the day to prepare my get-up.

A quick routine chilly walk to Hannaford's and twelve dollars and ninety-five cents later, and I had myself a twenty pack of Small/Medium Depend Underwear. Adult diapers. I also bought a bag of imitation crab meat, but that was not costume-related. Got back to good ol' 266 Andrews and test-drove a pair. Snug, comfortable and secure. But showed off way too much... me. It then took about eight more layers of adult diaper before I felt comfortably concealed.

So off we departed for Portland. The party was pretty happenin' by the time we got there. There were some issues though, such as the fact that I only knew about four of the thirty plus people there. I stuck around the other USM fellows and was prompted to change into my costume. I declothed to reveal my diaper, wings and brandished my bow and arrow of Love. My friends liked it, but the majority of the drunk strangers at the party did not so much. They acted rather offended/disgusted/confused/upset. It was even suggested to me I put my clothes back on. Shamed. I did so. And found my way to a cauldron of free jello shots.

Some great costumes there: Nate's roommate as an exact depiction of Hellboy. Miss Kate Law as Catharine the Great. The best was none other than the host himself, Nate Amadon, in a spot-on Hunter S. Thompson get-up. Straight out of Fear and Loathing. Brilliantly done.

Long story shortened, after a considerable amount of alcohol I took my clothes back off. I also felt more comfortable with the arrival of more people I knew, such as jessemiajackandykrisiankatecoreymichaelalindsay. They all liked my costume. The mass of strangers, now significantly more intoxicated, did as well. I made some new friends. Revelled with some old ones. Bummed some beers off of them. Shot some young lovers with imaginary arrows. Reached a fair-weathered level of drunk and was not sad to depart when we did. The ride home was a bit blurry. I think the alcohol in all the previously digested jello was being assimilated at that point.

I made it to bed and was able to wake up the next morning in time for rehearsal.

All in all, a good darned time for a theatre major to have a couple nights before All Hallow's Eve.

Pictures to come, after the jump.

Survey, Revised.

revised to increase interest and decrease lame
shamelessly stolen from: Ian Carlsen

Do yourselves a favor and just stop reading now.


I HURT: when the ACTF respondent picked on me during the critique.
I LOVE: listening to my music wherever I go.
I HATE: my lack of confidence.
I FEAR: the day after college graduation.
I HOPE: I get cast in the Student Written One Acts.
I FEEL: lonely sometimes in the morning.
I HIDE: from large social gatherings.
I DRIVE: correction: used to drive a 1988 Mercury Tracer.
I MISS: warm summer days and having more friends on-campus.
I NEED: to find my Workshop portfolio...somehow.
I THINK: i want to write a 10 min. for the 10 Minute Festival.



1. What do you most like about your body?: My hands.
2. And least?: My feet.
3. How many fillings do you have?: Four.
4. Do you think you're good looking?: Not very often.
5. Do other people often tell you that you're good looking? Sometimes.
6. Do you look like any celebrities?: Maybe Bon Jovi?

---

2. What was the last song you listened to?:
"Sunken-Eyed Girl" by Mike Doughty.

4. What song would you say sums you up?
"Aside" by The Weakerthans.
5. What's your favorite local band?
El Grande (opened for The Toasters).
6. What was the last show you attended?
The Toasters.
7. What was the greatest show you've ever been to?
Against Me! and Murder By Death @ The Station.
10. What is the most musically involved you have ever been?
I once was in a "band" and this band even had "practices" and once even played at a "show" and recorded an "album" on one of the band member's "computers". And that's about it.
12. What is your favorite band t-shirt?:
The Toasters one is pretty sweet but doesn't beat my black-and-pink Against Me! one.
13. What musician would you like to hang out with for a day?:
John Samson, of The Weakerthans.
14. What musician would you like to be in love with you for a day?
Regina Spektor. Hands down.
18. Punk rock, hip hop or heavy metal?:
I'm very into punk rock, the energy and messages are great, but I've never complained about a little hip-hop now and then. Del or Aesop or Saul, and such.
20. Name 5 flawless albums:
Weezer, Self-Titled. Dark Side of the Moon, Pink Floyd. Let Go, Nada Surf. Left And Leaving, The Weakerthans. Reinventing Axl Rose, Against Me!.
23. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
Grosse Point Blank if I recall
24. What was your last musical "phase" before you wisened up?:
uggh. I don't even know...somewhere far away near the land of the Backstreet Boys..
25. What's the crappiest CD/record/etc. you've ever bought?:
Nelly's Country Grammar, perhaps. That, or Natalie Imbruglia, but I did not buy that, it was a gift.






Told you so.

National Novel Writing Month.

November.

Along this page's sidebar, there is a new addition in the "Sites I Support" section.

This November, I will be participating in NaNoWriMo (national novel writing month). The goal is from November 1st, 12:00:01 am until November 30th, 11:59:59 pm, I must write a novel consisting, for the most part, of 50,000+ words. This is no easy thing. Ask my friend Jake Christie, who valiantly accomplished such a feat last November successfully with flying colors and such. He wrote "The Angel Del Oro" (now available for purchase). I've read The Angel and it's quite a read. Action. Adventure. It's sitting on my bookshelf right now, in fact. Jake lent it to me and I totally accidentally kept it all summer. Sorry for punking your book, man.

Anyways, I'm prepping myself to get some serious writing down. I'm also going to be operating the soundboard for Arms and the Man, my school's next Mainstage production, during this time. I'm sure a sleu of other things will come up too, that shall impede my progress. I'm going to invest a lot of money into Red Bull and maybe not sleep ever, but one way or another, I'm giving this thing my best shot.

It starts in 8 days. And I have some ideas.

Ideas I am not fully confident in, through and through.

Idea Number One. (working title: Copping Jake's Style)

An action/adventure novel based on your average-joe protagonist in extraordinary circumstances. He is accidentally mistaken for an agent of a secret organization and is delivered a package of highly valued materials that he must deliver, protect and keep his skin while he's at it. I have book called 101 Things to Do Before You Die, which is essentially that. A list of exciting, bizarre things to accomplish. In this story, I'd like the main character to do all of them as he goes along. Exciting? Suspenseful? Retarded? I don't know. The goal here is not to write a "good" novel, just a novel that has 50,000 words in it.

Idea Number Two. (copping Chris's Style)

I would feel guilty about this one. It would essentially be about college dorm life and the fucked up crazy social webs and situations that people get caught in. All while the world is ending. It would be very character-based, going in depth into histories and perceptions. It would be taking a lot out of my real life here, in Robie-Andrews. There would be an underlying theme of the degradation of communication in our current digital age. And the world would be ending entirely as the book progresses. Tsunamis, Earthquakes, Ice Caps Melting, Extinction, dayaftertomorrow THE WORKS. It would all be happening outside of the drama of the college campus. The protagonist will be a strong female character, but it will focus primarily on all the characters as a whole. I won't base the characters directly off of people I know, but bits and pieces of real life experience exaggerated and embodied fictionally will piece them together.
The unfortunate part is that this is slightly similar to a play done by Mr. Gyngell, and I hate to seem like a complete tool ripoff ass. They're different, for I'll include far more characters than four and it'll be a novel and not a staged production. It'd be fun to write, and easier than anything else. Once again, that's what this is about. Quantity over Quality.

50,000 words. Got to get it done.

Somehow...

(An Aside)

24 times now, by the way.

(except when you read this, it will be 25)

Nervous.

Show opens tomorrow (to a select audience).

Then the real deal.

If you all don't come, I'll cry.

And that's that.

Under Milk Wood.

This poster would be totally sweet, if only it were correct or accurate in any way.

The times are actually:
Oct. 21st, 7:30 pm.
Oct. 22nd, 2:00 pm and 7:30 pm
Oct. 23rd, 2:00 pm.

Students: $5.00
Adults: $7.00
Seniors: $5.00

Call for Reservations: (207) 780-5151

USM Gorham Campus, Lab Theatre.




...and basically everybody should come see it.

Trendster

I've recently taken to some activity that I'm not entirely proud of...

No, I speak not of corrupting the temple of my body with sexual intercourse, nor smoking copious amounts of marijuana, nor even downloading some of the finest artsy-fartsy porn the Internet can offer for my viewing recreational pleasure...(none of these things have happened in a long long time).
Instead, I find myself sitting in front of my computer, fingers on the keyboard, Safari booted up and firing away, my wallet open on the desk almost in shame, my debit card naked from it's neat paper sheath and sitting bare on the wood table, almost quivering from the onslaught onto it's personal being that will inevitably ensue...
Yes. I've been SHOPPING ON THE INTERNET!!

Yup. I'm there. I'm hip. I'm jive. Keeping with the times. Growing the ages. Rolling with the punches.
BEING A COMPLETE TRENDY HIPSTER FUCK.

Sorry, that rape of my bank account thing was a bit creepy...

Anyways, it's true. I've been punching digits and addresses and filling orders out and such. I never thought I'd see the day...
It all really started last year when I bought my roommate some bitching pint glasses from our favorite webcomic and the purchase went through and turned out successful. I hadn't really done anything since then, until these past few weeks. I, once upon a time, in my livejournal days, held a contest. The goal was everyone would submit links to teeshirts for sale online and I'd buy the one I liked best. The winner was from a site, Threadless.com, and was probably the coolest design ever. But I refrained from purchasing it, frightened by identity theft and just overuse of my debit card in general. Things have changed though...

The way Threadless works is:
People will submit their designs via a special photoshop format and it will be posted onto the site. The design then would be rated on a 1 to 5 scale by the viewers and depending on it's score compared to the other running designs, it would become part of the Threadless catalog. Then it would be printed in a variety of sizes, colors and styles and available for purchase via the World-Wide-Inter-Web. Their catalog is huge and jampacked with the indiest, artsyest stuff you've ever seen. I've already purchased two shirts from them: Put Pieces Together to Make a Peace, and Calling Home. They were sent to me successfully for a decent price and I was very very happy with the whole transaction.

So I decided to join the Street Team. If I take pictures of me wearing their shirts, I can post them on the site for reduced prices on other purchases. Awesome. And my parents called yesterday. My $250 refund check has arrived and is being deposited tomorrow/today. Awesome. And so now, A Fathom Farewell is soon to be mine.

Awesome.

Eww...shopping...

The design that won my contest has gone out of print, but I put in a request for a reprint. It'll only happen if enough people request it, but I'm hoping.

Two Things.

1.

Have you noticed how just about everybody these days says "I'm not going to lie" before or after a statement or comment on something referring to their opinion of it. It used to be just one of those sayings some people used rather infrequently, like tagging "that's all I'm saying" on the end of something, but now it's just elevated to the status of the "your mom" joke, which is hardly even a joke anymore than a knee-jerk dry remark, (your mom was hardly a joke last night). I use it just that much too, and am not trying to set myself apart from anyone here, but I've noticed and (I'm not gonna lie) I don't think I approve.
After a while of long thought on the matter, it seems to be okay. People admitting that they won't lie about how they feel is/should be something positive. I'm a steadfast believer that honesty is the best policy, and that everybody needs to be more honest and direct these days. Then again, isn't admitting your not going to lie just saying that you are very capable of lying in that situation, even though you didn't/aren't? I don't know if that's enough to warrant my newfound dislike of hearing "I'm not gonna lie" so much, despite my consistent use of it. Maybe it's just my subconscious rejection of new widespread trends, like Napoleon Dynamite quotes (I hate this, and am glad it has waned) or theatre kids having Avenue Q singalongs (I hate this, even though it's not widespread). I'm not even sure if I'm getting at anything here...

I don't know, people just have been saying it a lot, and people lie too much.
That's all I'm saying.

2.

I recently broke 1,000 page views from this site. It snuck past me and I'm at about 1,037 now, but I'm still pretty pumped about it. See the white number on the bottom left corner? That's StatCounter and lets me know how many people load this page and neat information like that. I KNOW WHO YOU ARE. ALL OF YOU. Well...not exactly. Just your IP addresses. Anyway, it's totally rad and here is some fun information to make the big 1K hit count:

• 75% of visits are less than 5 seconds in length. This can be attributed to lack of updates, or just people finding this link somewhere, coming here, realizing what this site is, and then promptly leaving, without even having taken off their coat or being given the tour. Rude, but I don't want to judge.
  
• One visit from the UK lasted over the course of one day.
  
• The largest amount of returning visits for one person is 75. He/she go to Bates College, uses Microsoft Internet Explorer and I have no idea who it is. None.
  
• The second is 41, and from Buckfield. Stop stalking me.
  
• Elizabeth Malmer is a girl in my philosophy class and I have never spoken to her. She has visited 15 times though, and also uses Microsoft Internet Explorer.
  
• Jake Christie has visited 16 times. He uses Mozilla Firefox. He's also funnier than me.
  
• People never find my site through a search engine.
  
• There are three other sites titled "A Writer's Lament." I can change the title of my blog but not the web address. I can deal with it.
  
• This site has an average of 6 returning visitors a week...
  

...and that is enough to make this site feel appreciated. I should do more actual writing than just pointing out funny links to things or making bulleted lists of stuff...

But whatever. At least it's not one of those LoserJournals, that's all I'm saying.

There's Just No Getting Around It

I just really wish I was Spiderman, that's all.

The Fight for Food!

Yesterday. Sunday. It was about 2:00ish and I had just risen from my sacred extra time in bed that I live for nowadays. I was hungry but in no hurry, after showering and dressing and such. I headed for a walk down to the cafeteria, noticing the extraordinarily warm weather after "the summer's" recent demise. Unfortunately, the cafeteria was close between the hours of 12:00 and 4:00 on weekends. I thought this ridiculous, since young men as myself need to eat and my meal plan is a costly 1,550 dollars. My pockets were lined with some extra cash, so I decided to head down to the local supermarket, a Hannaford's, and see what I could scrummage.
The walk was about ten to fifteen minutes at a leisurely pace, with my headphones playing the latest illegally downloaded selections from my music library. At the supermarket, I casually milled about, viewing and comparing and deciding. I only wanted a lunch, and not any sort of bulk materials largely packaged to be forgotten about in my fridge or closet. I carefully settled with some pre-made sandwiches from the deli, some muffins from the bakery and a large bottle of Juicey Juice (sooo good). I made friendly conversation with the register-dude, a friend of mine from classes, and was on my way.
Back in the sunlit sanctuary of my dorm room, I reclined in the leather recliner and ate my lunch. Delicious, nutritious and well worth it. All thoughts of the greasy, poorly-cooked campus food were eradicated from my mind, thankfully. I did not have to deal with one over-age slow-responding staff member or wait in any sort of line to get my food. That night, my quality lunch sat healthfully in my stomach until broken down and assimilated into my body. No gastric distress. No bowel catastrophe.

This got me to thinking. $1,550 dollars of mine go to my school so a catering service known as Aramark can fill my stomach with artificial butter, grease and the most-poorly-cooked staple foods you could even imagine. Everyone on campus accepts the fact the food ridiculously sucks and later that night it will revisit them during some private time with the toilet, except it'll smell worse the second time. I'm no doctor but the body shouldn't process food to poop in less than an hour.
We all complain. But we all still eat.

An Aramark facts sheet will tell you a meal at school costs approximately $7.00
My Hannaford-bought lunch came to $7.42 (and I didn't even eat my second muffin).

Revelation. I never want to eat here again. I bring this up to my roommate over our breakfast of undercooked eggs and ketchup. It's then, from him, I learn that you actually can not cancel your meal plan or get any sort of refund. My dismay at learning this information can not be expressed by mere text.

So plans were set in motion. Next semester, with time freed up from less classes and no theatre productions, my roommate and I are going to bring Aramark down. Petitions, Protests, Slander, Dissent. I refuse to have my money wasted like this.
FUN FACT: Aramark bought new waffle-irons that makes waffles have the imprint of "USM" in the center.

Fuck you, Aramark. I'm not going to take this sitting down (on a toilet, for half an hour).








P.S. That whole mastinence thing is sort of over now, after seven whole days. What the hell was I doing that for?